Memories

When my grand mother mentioned the life before in this town, it made me jealous of the life that they had. Imagining the fun that my dad together with his siblings when they were younger. The days when there were no cellphones, tablet, computers and all you got was everything around you but what I envy the most was when this town was still have small community and maybe the people back there was friendly and not full of gossip like today.

When she mentioned some stories, I always asked her about mermaids and yes according to my grand mother she heard a beautiful voice singing coming from the river couple of times; the mystery when my dad got lost and nowhere to be found for couple of hours and when he was back in the real world he mentioned a different world; the spanking moments of my uncles because they don't want to sleep in the afternoon or they did something wrong and made their mother pissed; when my grandma still know everyone in this town since there are just few clans in here unlike today; those are just a few but it never get old to me hence, I'm amazed. 

this was a photo of my grandmother and grandfather together with my dad, aunt and uncles taken at a Zoo 

This makes me miss my dad, papa, ikong and the ones that we've lost over the years. Its scary at some point because what if I don't have a story to tell to my grand kids like my grandma's memories, its scary because what if at one point in this life I forgot what the bond I used to share with my dad? With Papa? Makes me realize that maybe I wasn't able to maximize the time when there are still here. Couple of days ago, my dad was in my dream again and I forgot why I was crying but he hugged me so tight and I cried a little more (then sadly, my alarm started to wake me up).

I really miss them and since I can't go back, I was thinking of another tattoo. It was already a planned tattoo before for my grand father aka Papa but now, I realized it will be for the people we missed, lost, for the memories we shared with that person. Hopefully soon I'll can get my planned tattoos and I'll be starting to save up on August that's why I need to stop my make up haul to give way to my tattoo/needle cravings.

Well, its part of this life and we have to deal with it. Just maximize the time with who are presently around you who are full of positivity so in the end there will be no regrets :)

 "Sometimes, the hardest part isn't letting go but rather learning to start over" - Spencer Reid | Criminal Minds