Saturday, February 28, 2015

Random . February 2015


Hi. Love month. I need a new reminder-tattoo. Its been a while. 

I'm not planning on keeping it on my own. Have patience while I try to figure out some things. 

That was not as bad as I think of. New game plan later. 

Yeah. I don't have control to that. You are not the only person in this world. It also depends on what you did before so think again if you're going to complain soon. 

Now I'm questioning myself if I'm on the right spot. I don't have a heart of steel when everyone is not using their heads. 

I'm done with my cravings. Haha. 

I believe that each of us have a purpose in life and we have our own assignment that we are in a specific position because we have to be. Not everyone have eyes to see the beauty of this earth; not everyone have ears to experience good music or to hear a good laugh; not everyone have feet so they can run from their problems. The lesson, we are all different and if you have all your senses working, considered it as a blessing because not everyone have all of it. But as I was saying, they may not speak, hear, see, walk or run but still they have their own purpose, to teach other people that even they're incomplete to others they still feel complete. Same with material stuff because not everyone can have every latest gadget, not all of us can travel the world, not everyone can taste the different kind of foods this world has to offer, they can't buy new dress because above all of it they need to buy food for their family or meds for their sick relative. Same with work, not everyone can be a doctor, a technician, a teacher, a police, a sales lady. Imagine if everyone is all the same. Stop comparing yourself to other people because we are all different and each of us have a purpose. Go figure.| I'm trying not to be very specific but if I don't make sense then just ignore this. 

I'm trying not to put everything in my head because I can be fragile and out of control when it happen and some level inside me is on high alert. 

Some people will understand while some people will never spend time to think about it. 

I'm not that stupid not to know that it was already out. I'm not planning of hiding it. I'm just thinking of a game plan. I'm not like you who leaves when everything seems uncontrollable. I'm not going to leave in a middle of the process. I'm not like you. Take note of that. I'm usually a fixer. 

I'm done apologizing. Rule no. 6, Never apologize - It's a sign of weakness. | NCIS 

You want to blame someone. Fine. 

I need a new game plan because I know it will change eventually. 

Bipolar. Histrionic. Narcissistic. 

I somehow feel angry towards you after I was told on what you have said about me and I just proven you're such a mess.  

That move you just did proved that you can't follow simple directions. I just lost respect. Smh. 

Rumors always die. 

It will always be a long process. This is not a magical place where snaps and words can change something. 

I'll rather watch crime series than politics related shows. I'm not a big fan of politics. 

Juicing for almost 3 weeks changed me. I just need to make the right choices. I'll be back on juicing soon. 

Writing/typing my thoughts or whatever I wanted to say makes me feel good somehow because I have trust issues and I don't know who to trust. 

Someone is avoiding me. What are you afraid of? HAHAHA

Again, you need someone to feel useless. Fine. 

I hope I'm doing it right this time. Fingers crossed. 

Thank you so much. 🙏

Tattoo plans are keeping me sane. 

They said, "marry your best friend". Maybe he wasn't my best friend or he doesn't look at me as his best friend. 

Life happened. | NCIS S12E03 

The Walking Dead mid-season premier is sad but at the same time amazing. Sometimes choosing life means letting go. RIP Tyreese. | The Walking Dead S05E09 

Geez that Girls episode is a perfect one. I love it. Sometimes its not for everyone. | Girls S04E04

Maybe I shouldn't regret purchasing some things. I'll just upgrade next time. 

Midnight-browsing-shopping is just like window-shopping. 

All you need to do is ask. 

If we do first step, you react; if we move to second step, you react; if we move to the third step you complain. You're just all the same. 02.13.15

You are still in my dream. Usually, when it comes to you its different from anyone else. I just can't figure it out. #17

I don't know if its because of my trauma or watching too many crime series. Screw whoever is doing this. Its not funny. 

Sleepless nights again. For sure. 

Can you just don't talk about it for a minute? You're not here for a b-meeting. Ask something that make you look like you're too concern for someone. 

I don't wear too much accessories. My tattoos are my best accessories. 

The last two weeks was a mini roller coaster ride that sometimes, I refuse to write my rants but happiness won over other things. Last day of February and I'm ready for March. 

I  don't know why but it's not like candy where we can exchange every minute. No deal. 

Thursday, February 26, 2015

On Repeat . Today

Today by Williamette Stone

I watched If I Stay again weeks ago and I'm stuck listening to this ever since.


never knew it was a Smashing Pumpkins original song


Smashing Pumpkins - Today


Today is the greatest day I've ever known
Can't live for tomorrow,
Tomorrow's much too long
I blurred my eyes out
Before I get out

I wanted more
Than life could ever bring me
But by the choice
Of saving this

Today is the greatest day I've ever know
Can't wait for tomorrow,
I might not have that long
I'll tear my heart out
Before I get out

Today is the greatest
Today is the greatest... Day
Today is the greatest... Day
That I... Have Ever...
Known