Random . March 2016

When a current episode is giving you all the advices that you need. - Girls S05E02

And I just deleted it. Hello new month! #21

Thinking of what should be the next color of my hair.

Not planned coffee/tea date with aunt and cousin. :)

So tempted to do a call but if I know that it will not be answered and I will not have a bawi night then I think it's better not to call.

Thinking of possible next tattoo is keeping me sane for the past few days. Can't wait.

I can't like your post anymore because I think I'm being a creepy person already but I read them and still !!!! #06

Now I'm the one who need to do a major catch up.

The damages are too much.

A real 64GB.

There's no question for me how powerful love is but the story I just heard on the radio is so insanely beautiful and sad. (The guy really love the girl so much but even after 6 years he doesn't know if the girl love him dearly. He still believe though, so he is not giving up anytime soon he will just hold on forever).

Some people can't see that they've been taking some people for granted. Take a break from everything just spend some quality time with friends and most especially to your family (don't mind the money and time that you will be spending for the travel). Hate/anger is taking it away from you, break those walls, eat your pride don't let this time passed because you will never be aware how time flies. (love listening to other people's stories ever since most especially if it's from this radio station. Reminds me why I did listen to their programs during my break time in college).

Should I say sorry because it feels like I pushed you away? I want to but seems like I don't need to. 0304 #21

The writings of Regina Belmonte on her blog lately is a must read. Love every post and I can relate 80% of the time.

H, I know what your reason today. I'm missing the other reason you have before too.

Yikes! I've seen this before in my head but it's just happening now. I know I'm not distracting anyone at this side of the house. Time to blast more on repeat songs. Haha

The weather in this country is really a bummer. I hate that it's being too hot already. Oh well, summer is coming.

It's been a while since I watched a basketball on a Sunday. Congrats, Star!

Being too independent have its own disadvantages.

I posted a specific post about changing a month ago and I tell you again, if in your eyes people doesn't change believe me when I say they really do. The reason behind that post proved that to me.

Just one of those days. #mantra

Lesson learned. 32 / 64

Just passed a v-shop... Why are you everywhere

When I'm just all alone with too much people around, realizations are too much it's either scary or happy times.

It's amazing how I'm reading the same things that I'm being curious/thinking for the past few days from people I do follow online. Open minded people is a must in this world.

I'm just too jealous for everyone that's aboard and enjoying a lot of activities and show at Parahoy but I'm so happy for everyone too.

I'm so stoked for a lot of things this year. Saving up is a must to make all of it happen.

Am I analyzing too much or I'm just assuming things?

Cry baby. I miss you daddy.

Paramore is home to me.

I started typing something and I don't know when will I publish it but I know I will, just not now.

I'm coping by the only way I know how.

I'm being amazed on how all of this words are getting in my head right now. 0309

My mind is so off today. It probably got drained from yesterday's writing. Haha

Few new rules to follow that is not written anywhere just for myself.

Glasses all week.

Stop Aiv, it will never happen.

Cubao today because I need to get out of this town.

That was a smooth jeeptrip.

I really want to get out today because I think I'm suffering a writers block and I need some inspiration.

Docs plus pants. I really don't like that because it's not comfortable. But at some point I did that once and maybe never will do it again.

We watch/observe other people for us to forget ourself and our own issues.

People come and go that's not new. They also have different directions that they want to go to. Some will just passed but we don't need to stop because life goes on.

For all the time that I need to go home, last night was the ONLY day that feels like I left something. It was early than usual but it was really hard, he might have been there. (same area but never crossed paths). 03.12.16

Different lines/words from songs that I do listen now from the early days of Paramore until to the latest top 21 songs are hitting me hard. It's either making me realize things or inspire me to write another long post.

Did you just encourage everyone to leave this country behind?

I don't want to entertain all of this ideas in my head right now. Just not now because ideas/words/feelings overload.

If I will combine all of the song lyrics that I sing out loud because of how you made me feel it will be so cluttered and fucked up.

I know H, I miss him too.

I love busy days but sometimes it's too much craziness.

When will they realize that I will do whatever I needed to do no matter what day it is? They haven't seen it before? Haha. See the picture, it's not too big but it's the small things that make the big ones.

I need some of these words off in my head right now.

Never thought that it's already mid-March and I just realized that it's also been a month since the last long conversation. #21

This tattoo ideas are keeping me sane and making me so excited. Though I will surely break one of my personal rules but YAY!

I can't believe I haven't put a certain song on "On Repeat" post like Swim in Silence, Sunday Bloody Sunday and a lot more. Oh well, you will never know everything I listen to but there's a glimpse on my other Tumblr of who are my favorites.

This topic that I'm composing is either a good one or just a mess. / I'm done with it now, I'm hungry. Lol.

Wrong information!!! Excitement over everything. Haha

I don't know until when I need to wear glasses. Huhuhu.

Each song that I've been listening lately is reminding me a lot of things.

Stoked to see the chikababes later and hopefully the bro too. / No bro but the chikababes are complete! :)

Oh hello there old friend, Thursday. 0317

I was really drained after busy days and 2 long posts this week. I still have something in my head but I'm still trying to arrange it. 0318

2 weeks now and soon it will be 3rd then 4th then months and I will never notice it eventually. #21 031816

I have a question in my head but I think I already know the answer to that even it doesn't favor on my side.

NCIS taught me the value of family and friends. That's the reason why I love this show and why this will always be my favorite. (300 episode)

Some people are selfish. They will never see others just themselves.

Appreciate the little things. Always.

I can be bitter if I want to but the memory doesn't give justice to that.

Now I hate the weekends. Haha. My mind is so off today.

People, they're fast if they need something from you but then when you need them you can't find them. Tsk. 0320

No Internet so I think my cluttered thoughts will be fix now. We'll see. Haha

I'm so overwhelmed I may cry. These words that I'm typing are out of nowhere. 0321

Sometimes I just let the words play in my head instead of getting it all out because this feelings that you're giving me is too much to handle. Well, everything is just playing between I like to talk to you again and I miss you. #21

I want to stay in dreamland even it was literally the opposite of fairytale because you were there. The battle we fought in dreamland is over, maybe that's also the sign for reality being over. 0321

Should I put another song of CHVRCHES as an "on repeat" post? Lately it's always been CHVRCHES, Paramore and FTSK. Its been on my Playlist for the last 3 months now.

Yes I know you are asking for it and I'm not holding that from you but that message that you sent was something offensive. Tsss. This kind of act really changes my outlook to people. Good thing I got a lot of patience in my pocket and I'm still trying to be nice to people. So annoying.

There are things that I know but I believe it's not my story to tell.

Current situation make me think of you less but when it's alone time all I can think is you. 0324

Certain days, I convinced myself not to do the first move but sometimes I really want to text you.

I'm embracing these days that I'm wearing glasses again but I think I need a new one.

I somehow not entertaining some of my ideas in my head because it's just all about you and it seems redundant already.

Trying not to think too much since I'm having a headache.

Listening to Best Coast makes me realize things and make me appreciate myself more.

Another tattoo idea is added to my tattoo list.

That past few months was so fucked up, the result is so annoying.

This late night writings is making me tear up again. I'm amazed on where all of these words are coming from as always. Someone took out the writer in me. 0328

After blocking the idea of writing, now I can't stop. Making me happy at some point and I know it's super weird. Haha

From a FTSK track to another when my 3,000+ songs are on shuffle is not a joke, I got distracted from writing. 0328

I may judging and analyzing too much but it makes a lot of sense. This is a good start on this hopefully not super long process. #21

Surprisingly, I'm getting answers too fast even it's a tiny hint.

"It will never happen" is negativity but there are really things/situation that we want to happen but it will never be.

Wow. You have no right on saying such things because literally and figuratively, you don't have a single fucking idea about me or the things I do. What you see is not always what you get. 

Same artists, new playlist. 

It Will Never Happen

I've been telling that to myself ever since January and the last time Gem and I hangout she mentioned that out loud and I laughed. So funny that in the middle of our walk (on our way home) I almost freak out and I told her that it's the exact words that I've been telling myself lately we almost stopped in the middle of a busy street. 

There are certain situations in our life that we wanted something specific to happen or at least a different outcome on things but (fuck but) of course, this is REALITY. Reality where there's no fairytale and we will never know what will happen next. 

If only all of the things we wanted will be done by ourselves there will be a minimal problem but if it involves another person or depends on time and on certain situations, we all need to wait for the right time and we need tons of patience. 

It's not easy, results doesn't usually happen overnight it can take days/weeks/months and even years. All we can do is sit tight, hold on and continue our daily lives even we can't see results yet. 

If only we can write whatever we want to happen, it will be so perfect and it will also be a perfectly messed up fairytale. 

Gem and I are living differently, we do have different choices and decisions but we do undergo on the same serious stuff lately that we want to entertain at least, but it also depends on other people and situations. As much as we want some new things in our life the universe is telling us different. 

It will never happen

Maybe at some point it can but what if our decision contradict the situation, will it be our fault? 

Reality is unfair sometimes but maybe if we wait patiently the result can or not be on our side. Who knows. We are still living this life. There are things/situations in our life that we wish can turned out differently but we don't have a rewind button in life. It's okay to regret things but learn from it. The only thing that we can do is continue living because life goes on. Time and day will not wait for us, they will literally leave us if we decided to stop or take a break. 

So whether the things we want will happen or not, continue living the life at least you will not regret living. Eventually, the result will happen in this lifetime so all we need is live patiently, accept the highs and the lows, it's part of it. 

Sad things happen to all of us. - Eve | How To Get Away With Murder S02E14

03.15.16

On Repeat . Hate To See Your Heartbreak

Hate To See Your Heartbreak by Paramore

I can't stop posting something about Paramore because of Parahoy videos. I guess if the band never played for almost a year, you will really appreciate them more.

Hayley said too much before singing in this video that I think everyone should hear. I'm thankful that this kind of speech was captured, its a good reminder not just for the Parafamily but for everyone. 

HTSYH is one of my favorite and I think we need to hear it once in a while.

The ironic thing about declaring your happiness is that life doesn't just stay where you are, it keeps going. I hate to break it to you but happiness should never be the goal, it shouldn't. Maybe hope should but happiness shouldn't. I guess what I wanted to say to sum all that up to say really quickly is that don't let being sad or being upset about something take your hope away from you, ever. 

Sometimes, life just hits you right in the face and its alright because I for one I think its kind a cool to have a black eye every now and then. I think it looks good. Show you've been in places, done things and I think its definitely okay to have scars and definitely okay to hurt and be in pain and show it. That's why we have friends in this life and that's why we have music. 

Hayley Williams | Parahoy 2016

On Repeat . Phone Call

Phone Call by Forever The Sickest Kids

because I think its time to stop ... 

Well, I'm just a fool for you
And I think I'm going crazy
I can't control myself or contain my thoughts
It's eating me up inside
Now I see everything a little more clearly
The bad outweighs the good things
Was this ever a good thing for me?
Was this ever a good thing for me?

You're just a phone call away
Every day you seem further away
(You're just a phone call away)
I do my best to throw my pride aside and apologize
Cut myself down a notch
(Every day you seem further away)
And I know I said some things that hurt
Through ninety-seven missed calls
I'll finally get over you

All I, all I really wanted was a good job
A nine-to-five never seemed to cut it
Was too wrapped up in her to be working like that
Soon you'll see that everything will work out for me
So keep your promises you promised to me

You're just a phone call away
Every day you seem further away
(You're just a phone call away)
I do my best to throw my pride aside and apologize
Cut myself down a notch
(Every day you seem further away)
And I know I said some things that hurt
Through ninety-seven missed calls
I'll finally get over you

You're taking me places I've never been
You're feeling me out
And I'm filling you in
What's more important than saving yourself
From letting me in?
What's more important?
What's more important?
What's more important?
Saving yourself from letting me in

You're just a phone call away
Every day you seem further away
(You're just a phone call away)
I do my best to throw my pride aside and apologize
Cut myself down a notch
(Every day you seem further away)
And I know I said some things that hurt
Through ninety-seven missed calls
I'll finally get over you

Well, I'm just a fool for you
And I think I'm going crazy
I'm just a fool for you
And I think I'm going crazy
I'm just a fool for you
And I think I'm going crazy
I'm just a fool for you
And I think I'm going crazy

On Repeat . Hello Hello

Hello Hello by Paramore

I'm digging some Paramore old songs ever since that " Oh Star" from Parahoy.

The rebellious teenager in me can totally relate to this song and also to Stop This Song, Throwing Punches, Just Like Me, name it as long as it belongs to the B-sides of Paramore.  

I'm actually surprised that these songs haven't been to my "On Repeat" post but I think this will be my last Paramore entry for now because you may be sick of my Paramore posts. HAHA But I'm still addicted on watching some videos from Parahoy!!! I missed them so much and I'm happy that they're back. <3 

Hello, hello?
Is anyone home?
Hello, hello?
Just pick up the phone

I opened up my life to you,
I told you everything I knew,
You listened so closely to,
You listened so close when love was just a way out
But you're going deaf now,
Yeah you turned your head around,

Hello, hello?
Is anyone home?
Hello, hello?
Just pick up the phone,
You'll be sorry to hear,
I'm doing fine now,
Sorry to hear,
You're without me now

You blew up the world I built for us,
Destroyed our secret universe,
Threw out the trust I, put in you,
Making me feel like I'd been used,
And now I'm reminded,
That I was just blinded,

Hello, hello?
Is anyone home?
Hello, hello?
Just pick up the phone,
You'll be sorry to hear,
I'm doing fine now,
Sorry to hear,
You're without me now

I'm doing fine,
You'll be alright,
Maybe you'll think of me tonight,
You're doing fine,
And I'll be alright,
Just give me time, yeah

Hello, hello?
Is anyone home?
Hello, hello?
Just pick up the phone,
I don't wanna hear,
You're doing fine now,
Don't wanna hear,
I'm without you now

I'm without you now,
I'm without you.

On Repeat . Oh Star

Oh Star by Paramore

Oh Star, one of my favorite from the early days of Paramore and everything is being relive after Parahoy. 

So jealous to everyone who experienced Parahoy 

As they took some time off last year, I listened to a lot of artist but once in a while I still listen to Paramore but these past few weeks I've been listening to CHVRCHES (that was also on that cruise) and definitely no Paramore on my latest playlist but Parahoy happened and I think I'm just going to listen to Paramore songs all day again. I remember last weekend, I started to play some of their old songs like the B-sides and it feels so good. It feels like coming home after a long vacation. 

I'm one of the people who are waiting so bad for updates from the ship (Parahoy) because I badly need some Paramore live shows in my life. Would you believe that until now, the last few HQ full-show videos that I'm still watching ever since are the iTunes Festival 2013 and Reading 2014. 

Yeah, I'll be listening to Paramore for the next few weeks again and watch all these videos from Parahoy. bye for now . 

Thank you to Parafamily for uploading your videos <3 

Oh star fall down on me
Let me make a wish upon you
Hold on, let me think
Think of what I'm wishing for

Wait, don't go away.
Just not yet.
Cause I thought,
I had it.
But I forget.

And I won't let you fall away,
From me.
You will never fade.
And I won't let you fall away.
From me.
You will never fade away from me.

And now I let my dreams consume me,
And tell me what to think.
But hold on,
Hold on.
What am I dreaming?

Wait, don't go away.
Just not yet.
Cause I thought,
That I had it.
But I forget.

And I won't let you fall away,
From me.
You will never fade away.
I won't let you fall away.
You will never fade away.

And I won't let you fall away.
You will never fade away.
And I won't let you fall away from me,
You will never...

Oh star fall down on me.

On Repeat . Bury It

Bury It by CHVRCHES

can't find a decent video/audio of the original track that I can link here. This duet with Hayley will do since this is also the reason why I'm addicted to this song  

Cover up, cover up, cover up that you're ruthless
Nobody, nobody, nobody's ever gonna notice
And I am catchin' up and I am seein' red
How about I prove I'm right and raise it overhead?

I never promised you anything I couldn't do
We tried to bury it and rise above, bury it and rise above
You, you, you never promised me you were seeing differently
Bury it and rise above, bury it and rise above

You, you
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above

Reaching, reaching for, reaching for my resistance
Nobody, nobody, nobody sees it at a distance
And I am catchin' up and I am seein' red
How about I throw my way and raise it overhead?

I never promised you anything I couldn't do
We tried to bury it and rise above, bury it and rise above
You, you, you never promised me you were seeing differently
Bury it and rise above, bury it and rise above

You, you
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above

I never promised you anything I couldn't do
We tried to bury it and rise above, bury it and rise above
You, you, you never promised me you were seeing differently
Bury it and rise above, bury it and rise above

You, you
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above
You bury it, bury it, bury it and rise above

Book . Room

Room by Emma Donoghue

I read Room in 2012 that was the first and the last time I read the book and 2015, its already a movie. I never knew that they will make this a movie not until I saw on iTunes months before the release date. 

Room is one of the first book that I tried to read other than Mitch Albom that time because I was hooked on his books and now I'm not even reading his latest release. This is also one of the best books out there and I remember having all the feelings that I felt while reading and waiting for the next thing to happen. You can't just stop to flip the page. 

I'm not going to spoil some other than the book/movie description that you can read somewhere here on the interwebs. 

My comment/reaction: books will always be better than the movie adaptation. 

I already read the book so I already knew what will happen but I never re-read the book before watching the movie. While on the latter part of the movie, I'm almost confused if those are the exact situation on the book. Of course, its different. I browse the latter part of the book and confirm there are a lot of changes even with the names and others. 

I can't blame the author or the movie production that they can't do the same thing that's on the book. That's not possible anyway because when we read, we create another world that will just be understandable by ourself. I never imagined that Room is just that small, it was a little bit bigger on my head. 

As cliche as it is, Read the book first then watch the movie or read the book and never see the movie. lol

That's for me but seriously, there are a lot more happening on the book than the movie. Its even super detailed on the words that was originally written by the authors and as a reader we know how this writing process is no joke. 

Reading will take you away from reality for a while then you will be able to create a whole new world together with the characters. Watching is different, yes the feelings and the message was there but it was just like giving you a test with the answers on the other sheet of paper. 

One reason why I haven't watch "Gone Girl" and "The Great Gatsby" because I want to read it first. Like any other book turned into movie, there will be always changes but the mystery is still hidden on those pages. 

Sure I also watch a movie first sometimes but I discovered that the true story are written on those pages.

Anyway, just like "If I Stay" and "The Fault In Our Stars", "Room" should be read first before the movie. Its an awesome read so try it before watching if possible.

~

Room also got a very positive feedback from all over the place and people will surely be intrigued, so here's the trailer

Congratulations to the whole team for the awards and to Brie Larson for getting tons of Best Actress awards!

"It's called mind over matter. If we don't mind, it doesn't matter" - Room | Emma Donoghue

Double Check

When I discovered how to use Ebay late last year and when I already know how usually we can get an international package, I ordered not too much but I already bought several items from all over the place and I was never asked to pay more than 100PHP ($2.30) on the post office until the arrival of my Canon 24mm where I was charged 1,135PHP ($26).

The box says it all, its a Canon 24mm lens and I was surprised that it was already on different box sealed with a PHL POST tape not an international box when this came from Korea. I want to compare it with a used Dr. Martens that I bought from UK (which I haven't blog about) that is literally much heavier/bigger and a little bit more expensive than this lens but I was never taxed more than 100PHP. 

I'm not against on charging me more than 100PHP but it's also a bit funny and annoying at the same time most especially if I already received a huge box than this. Maybe because it's Canon but dang it the Dr. Martens (Bethan) cost more than this lens. Haha. Even it was already used but still, used docs usually have bigger value. 

I don't know on how they compute taxes and all but if it's because of the price then it's reasonable but if you will just depend on the box itself or even on the country where it is from, then they should have some reality check. 

Dr Martens (Bethan)

For now, I'm really done shopping because it's time to save up.

On Repeat . You and I

You and I by PVRIS

I know it's warmer where you are
And it's safer by your side
But right now I can't be what you want
Just give it time

And if you and I
Make it through the night
And if you and I
Can keep our love alive, we'll fight

We can meet in the middle
Bodies and souls collide
Dance in the moonlight
When all the stars align
For you and I, for you and I, oh

Well it's cold when we're apart
And I hate to feel this die
But you can't give me what I want
Just give it time

And if you and I
Make it through the night
And if you and I
Can keep our love alive, we'll fight

We can meet in the middle
Bodies and souls collide
Dance in the moonlight
When all the stars align
For you and I, for you and I, oh

But for now we stay so far
Till our lonely limbs collide
I can't keep you in these arms
So I'll keep you in my light

But for now we stay so far
Till our lonely limbs collide
I can't keep you in these arms
So I'll keep you in my light

Can we meet in the middle
Bodies and souls collide
Dance in the moonlight
When all the stars align
For you and I, for you and I, oh