Letting Go . My First Doctor

How many times you let go of something that once made your day?

I'm not sure on how many times I experienced this already but I'm about to let go my first ever Dr. Martens. I'm selling it for about $70 and I got it for $150 for almost 3 years ago. (you can read my excitement when I got this here).

I will never forget this baby but I don't like seeing it eaten by dust on my shoe rack. I didn't have a hard time looking for buyers because I know someone so close to me having a UK4 size. Actually, my sister is but she doesn't want a docs so I'm going one more step and its my dear cousin who is a docs addict at some point. Hehe. She got her first docs last last year (you can read my post about her here).

I'm happy that they are willing to adopt one of my babies and I'm sure it will last for so long until they will be sick of it because its a Dr. Martens (you will never understand if you don't own a pair).

I don't want to sell it to other people because I still want to see it, I still want to witness the journey of my first docs who once made my day after all the hard work on our thesis in college. I want the people who will appreciate it and who will take good care of it and I'm happy that it will be my cousins (for now because once they feet will be bigger than a UK4 then its up to them if they will give it to other people who deserve to own a pair).

I took this photo when I was cleaning it the night before I gave it to my cousin

I heard that my cousin even wore this when she took an admission test for college! what a way to continue the adventure of that boots. <3

"An adventure is an open window" - Finding It | Cora Carmack

Friends

I have some days that I fucking miss the old people that I used to hangout, the people who I talked for hours, some people who I used to see every night but most of them are just the familiar faces, old friends, I-know-him/her people. People do come and go in our life but lately, I realized I'm so lucky to have few friends who will stick through thick and thin. I don't usually hangout every night or every week with friends but we don't need to have communication on every fucking minute just to say we're friends. We're grown up now. :)

Sometimes, I get jealous of people who posted on those social networking sites and hangout with friends every week or every other day or whenever. But some of them are just the hangout-friends. Or maybe you just have a lot of money just to spend drinking in a bar or having fun every weekend. Some people are not game to waste money just to have a drink in a bar. Go figure.   

I don't want to mention names as possible because I don't want to hurt someone who will never be mentioned. I treasure my close/true friends who I can talk to whatever stuff we come up when eating or having coffee or walking (but it was eating most of the time. Hahaha).  

Treat your friends the right way. Don't take them for granted. Don't harass them just to hangout because you're free for the rest of the night, don't judge them if they can't make it at some point. Some people have valid reason why he/she can't hangout with you. Worst if he/she don't want to hangout with you in reality because maybe you have done something he/she feel offended but give him/her some time to get over. One day she will hangout with you again.

Having same interest with your friends is just amazing. Beyond the busy schedule, you still plan for this and that and hopefully even a single thing will happen. because most of the planned things don't happen.

I told myself before that I should never turn down an offer to hangout with friends but there are things that will make that rule complicated and those are the unexpected treatment/attitude.

Friends, you will never get anything in just a snap.

You treat other people nicely, you should treat your friends triple than that.

As much as possible I think I lost enough people who I thought will be my forever friends so I don't want to happen that again right now with the people I know will be there no matter what.

If you just want to hangout with a friend then just tell him/her. Don't brag someone who will feel so out of place just because you want to see the other one. That's rude.

Sometimes, I feel I don't know you anymore.

Loose some air in your head my friend or else you will fall 6 ft under the stars.

To the people I used to hangout, thank you. I still appreciate those days because I will never be this person if you weren't part of it and  yes, there are days that I miss you but we have to move on. We need to.

Some of us ended friendship because we lost communication or maybe you just upgraded your status so we can't be friends anymore. We may or may not have a closure so I just wanted to say thank you and if ever I did hurt you at some point, its either I meant that or not. Sorry!

And to the friends who I know will be sticking through thick and thin. Let's do this to infinity and beyond.

I love you guys, so much. :))

"Keep your feet on the ground, while your heads in the clouds" - Brick By Boring Brick | Paramore

On Repeat . Lucky One

Lucky One by Simple Plan

I was on my way home from my 'birthday-javu' with the 'Brobabes' last Friday night and while sitting on the jeepney with earphones on (of course) and my new playlist on my iPod is on shuffle I heard this song and put it on repeat for the whole trip.

I scheduled a post about my (sadly) first rant post for 2014 and this song is the perfect song to save me from those thoughts. I already played this song couple of times but then I was doing something so I never had a time to repeat and listen to each word until I was on my way home last night.

Simple Plan saved me since 'No Pads, No Helmets Just Balls' specifically the song 'Perfect'. I've seen them live twice first in 2005 and in 2012 (I missed their 2008 concert because I was busy with school stuff). 

When I saw them last 2012, they never change playing live. One of the best band who worth to witness live.  Their energy is so good! Love them.

You can check their recent release of a live show in Australia here (I can't put the video itself). It was released last December 24, 2013.

Recently, they released 'Get Your Heart On - The Second Coming' since according to them they recorded too many song when they record the album 'Get Your Heart On'. Everyone loves this new album and they never fail, they're saving my life again.

This song makes me smile and tear up a little bit.  

Lucky One by Simple Plan

Why the stars are lined up so perfectly
For everybody, but not for me?
I wish it could be easy
But it never goes that way
It’s never like the movies
It’s never like they say

Well, maybe one day I’ll be back on my feet
And all of this pain will be gone
And maybe it won’t be so hard to be me
And I’ll find out just where I belong
It feels like it’s taking forever
But one day things can get better
And maybe my time will come
And I’ll be the lucky one

Now I can’t stop thinkin’
How this life could be
I can keep pretendin’
But honestly
Does it really make a difference?
Does it really ever change a thing?
It’s never like the movies
It’s never like you think

Oh, maybe one day I’ll be back on my feet
And all of this pain will be gone
And maybe it won’t be so hard to be me
And I’ll find out just where I belong
It feels like it’s taking forever
But one day things can get better
And maybe my time will come
And I’ll be the lucky one

So give me a reason to keep holdin’ on
Something that makes me believe that my life’s gonna change
Seems like everyone else gets a shot, gets a break
I can’t wait for that to be me

Maybe one day I’ll be back on my feet
And all of this pain will be gone (all of this pain will be gone)
And maybe it won’t be so hard to be me
And I’ll find out just where I belong (I’ll find out just where I belong)

And maybe one day I’ll be back on my feet
And all of this pain will be gone
It feels like it’s taking forever
But one day things can get better
And maybe my time will come
And I’ll be the lucky one
And I’ll be the lucky one

Rant . Insomnia

what keeps me awake in the middle of the night

How am I typing a rant for this year? Well, maybe it doesn't matter if its a new year or not but some things are on my mind so I guess this will be a start that may or may not published on the month of January. Who knows. Well its January 7, 2014 02:07.    

~

Basically, everyone gain weight after the holiday season and I think its rude that the first thing you always say to me is that I'm fat. (Thank you!)

Stacy of The Plump Pinay posted this and this and thank goodness for people like her and her twin and the other Plump Pinays and even the other people out there who accept the different body types that other people don't know exist. 

How many new years do you need before changing your attitude?

~

Some people are unfair.

You treat other people better than the other when both need to be treated fairly. Maybe your not appreciating who's in front of you and just focusing on the people who you believe are better so you'll treat them special than the other one.

But I have faith that even they are not appreciating what's in front of them, those things will be appreciated. Maybe not now but eventually they will be.

~

Fixing yourself is the first step but don't be stuck there, socializing to people should be the second step of thousands. If you will not reach the 2nd step then learn how to get there. A friend, your parents or guardian or anyone can teach you that even not directly. You have to keep walking, you need to.

~

Sometimes, you don't need to believe on other people. You all need some faith. Believe to yourself. Accept whatever it is. You don't need to pretend.

~

People will not always believe you but as long as you're telling the truth then let go of it.

Some people avoid seeing familiar faces, ask yourself why.

We are all people who may or may not having a common ground but it doesn't mean that we are both living the same life. We have different priorities, daily routines, different situation so don't expect that we are the same.

~

2013 really taught me a lot of things. 

~

Hopefully, one day the clouds will parted and I'll see the the straight path along the way.

I wish that the un-notice will be notice, the people who deserve a different taste of attention will be given and hopefully, after all the hard work (in any kind) it will be paid off.

Let's just keep faith and everything will fall in the right places.   

1st month of this year and this is how I feel. WHY.  

On Repeat . Call It Off

Call It Off by Tegan and Sara

As usual, we are on our way to the mall, my earphones are on when this song played and I just put it on repeat.

I love the intro, how slow it is and the meaning.

I search on the magical world of the interwebz on what's the real meaning of this and I found out that it was about the Myspace-stalking of Tegan. When you know the meaning the song itself changes your perspective about it.

I can relate to the stalking (but now on facebook) part and I still do it once in a while oh and that's what I feel when I'm browsing my newsfeed and that's why I'm not usually on facebook.

Maybe I like it because it fit on my relationship with my (ex)best friend oh wait it fits on all of my ex-friends. Its not that I'm still not over it but just like a song, you will never care if it was released in the 80's, 90's or whenever but as long as you experienced something like it you just want to listen and remember but definitely not bury yourself in the same situation that you've been thousand of days ago. Sometimes its more on over looking the past, how messed up you are after a heartbreak, a friendship that you once thought will last forever. Remembering will not hurt, sometimes, it will make you smile because you'll realize after those fucked up days you're still standing tall, smiling.  

And I don't know how many times I'll say I love this song so instead of putting I-love-this-song-comment just listen to it. Tell me if you like it or not it. 

"Call It Off"

I won't regret saying this
This thing
That I'm saying
Is it better than
Keeping my mouth shut
That goes without saying
Call, break it off
Call, break my own heart
Maybe I would have been
Something you'd be good at
Maybe you would have been
Something I'd be good at
But now we'll never know
I won't be sad
But in case
I'll go there
Everyday,
To make myself feel bad
There's a chance
I'll start to wonder
If this was the thing to do
I won't be out long
But I still think it better if
You take your time
Coming over here
I think that's for the best
Call, break it off
Call, break my own heart
Maybe I would have been
Something you'd be good at
Maybe you would have been
Something I'd be good at
But now
We'll never know
I won't be sad
But in case
I'll go there
Everyday,
To make myself feel bad
There's a chance
I'll start to wonder
If this was the thing to do
I'll start to wonder
If this was the thing to do

ps. I can't stop listening to Tegan and Sara since I saw them live last November 25, 2013! Can't wait to see them again soon. :)