Random . December 2015

12.01.15 - 11:11 Game 3 tickets and Championship

I still need 3 tickets. 

I should reminded myself of what I wrote weeks ago. Damn it. Anyway, ticketserye continues. 

MOA Arena, I hate you. You shouldn't be the venue of this game 3. You didn't let the ultimate fan witnessed the game live. 

UAAP should start considering Philippine Arena as a venue of UAAP Finals. 

20th crown to Morayta!!!

If you are going to flirt don't brag your friends. Most especially if there's one major event that is happening. You ruined the moment. Selfish move. 

You can't bond with two circle of friends in one day. Unless you all agreed to separate ways on a certain time. If it's basketball day you should not have a date with people who doesn't care about basketball. Unless you're forever alone then you can do whatever you want. 

I want to write something about the championship but I'm super hype that I don't know where to start. Maybe after a few days. Hehe. 

Watching the replay and who would have thought that even we were down until the last 3 minutes and the score was so close under 2 minutes of the game. Wow. Pogoy and Mike. Wow. 

This back pain is making me curse a lot. It hurt so bad. 

Social media is bad for your health. 

It's on who you choose to believe in and it depends on what you see and to your guts. It's not about the hearsay anymore. We are all grown-ups and definitely not a kid anymore, make your own choices. 

Manila! I'm coming! Yay!

I hate wearing pants at some point in life. Feels like my legs are imprisoned. 

I miss college life so bad. Can we go back? :( 

Now I'm a bit regretting the past two months that I've been stress-eating. 

It's not bad to watch the world moving without you in it but doing it as a habit is a different story. 

Jollibee Gate 4. So good to be back and feels good to be surrounded by schoolmates. These guys are so lucky to be in school and then we got a championship. 

You might think that I don't belong here. Hehe. Guys been here since 2006. 

Good or bad as long as I'm spending time with friends, it's all good. 

You're The Worst is one of my favorite TV series lately. I don't know why it's so close to me. 

I will always miss having that one guy who always care. I miss the way we used to be. #17 

Maybe that's one major reason why because who does care?

One huge reminder to self, don't fucking stress eat again. 

It's just weird when you hear an old song then you are surprisingly singing along with it and you know all the words but it's kinda amazing. 

Stuck in traffic and it makes me think about stuff. All good and still appreciating life. 

Some people will never really understand the differences of everyone. 

Close minded people will forever stuck on their little world and continue to hurt everybody. 

Scared because that's my weakness. I do understand deeply but not on that situation. 

That's why you don't want to be too attached to people most especially when you are planning to leave. 

Hello rain! Why now? I'm not going to enjoy your presence. 

Music saved my blog for the past months. 

Don't tell me that you didn't expect that. You know it will happen. 

mantraaaaaaaaaaaa. I badly want to do a road trip. 

5 years later, it is Jeremy.... so sad. I'm still looking forward on seeing Paramore live again. 

Fighting my own insecurities. 

We win without the veterans / star players? Wow. Just. Wow. 

I'm having another weird night again. Goodnight. 

Will it be on my way anytime soon? I wish. I wish. 

I'm claustrophobic. That's why I'm terrified. People doesn't care and never will. I'll try to fight this feeling. 

A bit alarming, I'm numb on some part. /// Then I realized that the soft spot on me was well buried deep inside. 12.22.15

I want to help you but if you will be so selfish then I'm having second thoughts.

I want to finish all of my pending post here but I'm a bit drained now, goodnight. 

I'm going to make it happen this time. Baby steps. 

Merry Christmas! 

I don't know why I'm feeling like this. Life. 

I'm a bit worried with this but let's depend on the other feedbacks. 

One of my new year's resolution will be "never stress eat again" and "Starbucks should just be once a month". 

Sometimes crying is healthy. Happy Birthday to me. 

Oh thank you but I'm not a prima donna. 

Quietly giving people some consideration as a gift. 

It's the last for now but will it be really the last time for me? I didn't slow down instead I rushed. 

I think it will arrive next week after all of the holiday craze. Patiently waiting....

~~~

2015

You've been a great one and I'm happy that I was able to survive. 

One of the toughest but let us not forget the happy times with friends and laughter with family. 

Every year is a new roller coaster ride and I'm looking forward on what's with 2016. 

Thank you, 2015. 

5 Years Later

I don't know what to feel. Sometimes there were signs that this will happen but you don't pay too much attention to it and then being on break for so long you will be reading such thing.

I still want to stay positive about it but hopefully Hayley and Taylor are so willing to go on together with Jon and Justin. If they are willing to go on we are just right here. I believe that their calling is to make music and inspire people so let's keep our fingers crossed. 

I still need some new Paramore songs for my life.

Never mind the bar tattoo it still symbolizes a very good year after the Farro brothers left.

Jeremy, we want to hear your side. :| 

Let's wait what's in store for Parafamily in 2016. 

PARAMORE IS STILL A BAND. 

Random . November 2015

I'm doubting myself again. Great. It's going to be an amazing month.

Thankful for that message.

Some people said that I gained weight and I'm not offended after all. I'm just like "oh the stress-eating is working". Lol.

Boundaries. Strangers. 11.02.15

I want to type something but I'm tired.

I'm not terrified with it because I know I shouldn't and most especially I haven't done anything wrong.

Facts. You should know about it. Well, you don't know how to listen why would I expect you to know about stating facts.

I think they are getting used to my "shutdowns".

Shhhh.

Ortigas ....

Happy Birthday, Daddy! I miss you.

Such a super hot day.

Despite of the result of every game, the best thing at the end of the day is there will always a memory to treasure with friends. Love you guys!

PLEASE NOT TODAY. /// THANK YOU. (though, I know the next days will be different). Whatever.

I'm not good on giving a speech most especially if I'm not prepared. Haha. I just realized some good message after.

You can choose what you want to believe in but one thing for sure, you weren't there.

I love it!

When you leave it's going to be different and difficult.

It's not on who to agree with but it's how to make right choices.

I can handle traffic just not in the morning.

I just added a few numbers on why I'm not a morning person.

I was left behind and then my iPod died when I'm just about to leave and the morning traffic and I don't know what else but hopefully there will be an awesome turn around later.

What a day. Though it's not over yet. Still hoping for that turn of events.

People don't want this certain table in a restaurant because of the aircon but that's the way I like it.

I bought something yesterday because the result of the game makes me sad now, I don't like it anymore. Ugh I hate impromptu shopping.

Will never apologize for enjoying life.

Too much familiar faces in one place.

The perks of knowing how to commute. #mantraaaaaa. Lol

What. A. Game. We are back in the UAAP Finals.

I can't stop smiling because of the game yesterday. :D

I got my d back and the convos! Haha

So it will be the battle of 1st and 2nd.

Sleepy but ugggh.

So what is J? You're being so funny right now.

One more win.

My hair gained a fan. Haha. So strange but feels good.

One day at a time.

I hope Resurrection: Ascension can resurrect me from being so sleepy. Haha.

I'm looking for justice. Some people are just going to watch this game because your school is on the Finals. Dang. We've been supporting them since elimination and I'm still lining up for this. Tsss. And the 1:1 ticket selling is fucking hilarious. Why do people do it? They want everyone to line up? Why don't try 1:2.

Another defeat. Please, we learned our lesson together make a change this time. One last push.

Happy Birthday to the coolest coach ever! :) #TamsLoveCoachNash

This journey to get a UAAP FINALS tickets is so insane. I never get problems during eliminations and now everyone is showing up like mushrooms. Any justice for us who supports this team since day 1 of this season?

Random .October 2015

Was that my dad's voice? Omg.

I feel you. So sad with what's happening here too. Get better. 

We're killing some time here in Manila (McDo in UE to be exact) and it's 2AM and the store is full of student reviewing. I super miss college days. 

Hello, piyu! There are students who are already lining up for CDC tickets. I salute your dedication, guys. #HornsUp

Just one of those days when I start questioning myself again. This week has been shitty that's why I stressed-eat for the whole week and I just need me-time for today. That night roadtrip yesterday wasn't enough.

Here we go again. Maybe this time I'm not going to complain but doesn't mean I stop fighting. 

I believe "K" will arrive at the right time. I just wonder when it will be.

Tattoo plans. 

I wish aka Sam will say "go". I want to try it this year.

CDC was a cooking show and same with FIBA? wtf. 

After wearing the Bethan to church, I know I also want the Jadon. Oh yes. I already got a Bethan! 

My favorite series are back! Feels like my extended family are here for me again. I miss them so much and I'm happy their back. 

I don't need to go detailed. 

Found the perfect word! 

Don't make another risky decision.

Some people doesn't know how to be nice to other people.

Seriously, you don't need to feel like that. But it was nice seeing the one seated beside you. 

Thank you for making me and my friend so beautiful today. Hahaha. - 10.07.15

Go ahead make some rush decision. Remember there are consequences later. I bet you don't know. 

I know why I can't sleep properly. 

Yikes! I'm not late. Just arrived on time. (things we do for basketball). Haha

2-0 against ADMU!!!!

Don't expect. Limitations. 

When you are at an airport and you just want to hop on a plane to somewhere. 

Could you be more obvious? - NCIS S10E16

Our rebelious side is just inside. 

Did I left my cc somewhere? Huhubells. 

There are such good distractions lately. That's why I don't dwell on the stressful side and I'm very thankful to that. 

Always nice to hear some good inspiring stories. Makes you realize some things.

I don't know you but I miss you. 

Messy as my hair since May. FU

Writers block but I need to write something because I think this is just the one thing I can do when there's no electricity. 

I keep on getting that advice. I know that I'm applying it ever since. It's just up to the people who add and change the story. 

The "memories" reminder on Facebook is bringing memories back. 6 years tops. I love it though I have no idea why I did post certain words before but the pictures and some words from old friends makes me miss the old days. Can we go back? No. :/ 

This is a very very bad decision and very wrong. A W K W A R D. 

My first time to rant in real time.

I will never say sorry for my behavior right now. This ambush meet up should never happen again. 

I should have stayed at home and just watch a movie or catch up on AHS. 

A day with you? Sure. But it wasn't you who was in my dream for a day. It wasn't you but I'll be happy if it was you for real. Bacs!!! - 10.22.15

The reason why I don't watch such genre.

If only its okay to give up. 

I hope one day they will be able to give back to everyone who sacrificed.

I need be somewhere far away from here. 

h w g a 

h w g a day 2

FYI, its not just like 1 2 3 pass. 

How am I supposed to bid? When the bids are winning - Acumen 

Jeepney ride is one of my favorite too. Some time to kill while thinking and it includes major-life-decision. 

Why do people judge easily when they were never be on my position? h w g a day3

Too much thoughts running on my mind right now. I'll just stare at the ceiling maybe it will help, or not. 

It's fucking haunting me. What is modern nightmare. H w g a day4

I need a good distraction. 

I may decide last minute with that offer. I still have time to think about it. 

Good thing today was better than yesterday. I never imagined myself being that miserable. 

Saving all my energy for tomorrow. Choose another day to mess with me, not today and tomorrow. I already have too many nightmare lately. 

Thankful for that jeepney ride. 

People should slow down. Most especially if it comes to that matter. 

On Repeat . Golden Boy

FYI, I didn't joined the bandwagon lately.

I'm going to be honest that I've been watching this video everyday and let's not just mention how many times. Haha

I can't say how many reasons why I do watch it again and again but here are 10 reasons in no particular order:

1) TERRENCE BILL IS SO TALKATIVE. If you know him when he was still in collegiate, this guy always have just a few words when people interviewed him or when fans talk to him. 

2) HE WAS LAUGHING AND SMILING A LOT. Dude, seriously if you were able to have a picture of him taken during UAAP days, you will never have a smiling TR on your picture. A friend even ask him to smile on one picture for him to smile. Haha. 

3) ENGLISH! but he really prefers tagalog. (well, most of us here does).

4) HIS CHOICE OF MUSIC. I know we listen to different kind of genre and I know most guys do listen to RnB/rap music but I never saw Jolina Magdangal coming to the picture. I do have an idea that he loves to listen to OPM but I never saw the 90's vibe. Ever. I'm sure everyone was so surprised (well, he just revealed it on 3x3). 

5) FOCUS. The cameraman focus on TR too much! I can see his pores and the muscle on his face says a lot. 

6) I think he will be a nice road trip buddy just be sure he will wear seatbelt. Haha. 

7) HE JUST WOKE UP. 

8) When we will pass on the same area where he started playing Tameme, I will remember him. Haha 

9) the way he practice his dribbling skills. Wow.

10) HE RAP and SANG A BIT. Also, when he said "oh. damn"

I have a soft spot for this guy ever since.

Terrence, if you want to put color on your hair just tell me I'll make it green. Hehe.

I'm just so proud of him and he doesn't have any idea about it.

"Maybe more people see me but I don't think more people like me, the way I play because I think those people who knows basketball they will not judge you the way you play. Sometimes the one who doesn't know how to play it or doesn't put a love on a basketball are the one who say something bad to you. 

I can't blame them that's their life. 

They can say whatever they want to say". 

- Terrence Romeo

Goodbye

I'm not a huge fan of goodbyes.

I realized that there are two types:

1st - saying goodbye. It's okay to say bye to have closure but when you know it's for good, that sucks. When you meet someone and you just said goodbye because you need to separate ways but then you feel that there's something missing but the power of the universe says you need to separate ways, now.

2nd - no closure. After the 1st one I think this is the not so hurtful but it will make you so angry. You will be left hanging on everything and you will wonder so many what if, why this and why that until you just need to assume for some reason to convince yourself that it is also his/her reason just to stop yourself asking why but then on a dull moments of your life, you will still think about it again and again and again.

One thing I learned in Economics is "it can never be both" but what if you experienced both and both of them sucks, does it mean you just hate "goodbye" itself?

*if this makes you so confuse, welcome to my world

Hardest 180 of my life - Tony to Ziva | NCIS S11E02

Palawan 2015

the summary of my Palawan trip in 11:29 minutes

I just want to go back there ......

Random . September 2015

My Twenty One Pilots photos are on queue now on my photo blog

Ber months. Be good. You're my favorite. 

This back pain is killing me. 

Basketball all week until UAAP opening!!! 

Why still ask when its already planned? I feel I was betrayed. Now, I'm beyond confused on where to put myself. 

Chill Aiv. Chill. Everything will be okay. 

I'm literally not lost but I think I am. 

I won a car? Oh its just a dream. F*ck

Learning how to detach myself. F*ck emotional attachment.

I should finish this video project before UAAP because you know, basketball. Hihi

I will never get tired of saying, I'M SO PROUD OF TERRENCE BILL ROMEO. 

Whatever. Good thing there are basketball games to look forward to. 

When you said that, it break my heart. I hope you were able to tell that to him. - 09.06.15

I was too busy the whole weekend enjoying life. Recap... We won against ADMU!!! What a nice start for this season. And that mini road trip with friends. :D 

I SAW YOU SO CLOSE THIS TIME BUT THEN I GOT SHY SO I WASN'T ABLE TO STARE AT YOU AND EVEN ASK FOR A PICTURE WITH YOU. :| 09.06.15

That's nothing compare to everything. 

Lets continue to be a mystery. 

Another plane ride? I wish. #dream 

We didn't win today. Bounce back, Tams! 

Here we go again..... But that's okay. We can do this. 

No body is perfect so don't act like you are. 

If you are angry at him then how can you swallow to be here every now and then? You may not know this so I better tell you that he is just here. You may not believe but I'm telling you he can hear you.  

I can't purchase the shoes because I'm having second thoughts and I'm still broke. Why. And now that website is down. 

Chances are very slim...... #mantra 

Sometimes I think its too much so I make adjustments but then its not enough when I lessen it. 

I'm so fucking confused. Sometimes I think I'm on the wrong position and I don't know where to put myself anymore. 

I don't want to be someone I'm not. 

Can I just have my 6th tattoo? Now? I need some intoxicating and to feel pain so it will bring-me-back-to-earth again. It will make me feel alive. 

How much faking do I need to do to survive this reality? I thought being yourself is way much accepted? 

"I've been thinking too much. Help me." - Ride | Twenty One Pilots 

I wish life is just as simple as 1 2 3. 

My favorite TV shows will be back in a few days!!! Something to look forward to. 

Is it crazy that I watch the videos that I edited just to remind me that I'm not always this down? That once in a while I was able to laugh and had a great time in this shitty reality. 

Send your complain to the creator of the software not to me who is just a user of their product. You're making me laugh. 

Lets admit that it fucking hurts when they thought that its just easy to do. As in so fucking easy as one two three. FYI, ITS NOT and as result of your patience range, you will not be able to do this. 

It was only just a dream..... Bacssss :( 09.14.15

The result of your insult and doubts, I'm procrastinating at its finest. 

Oh shit. That's one more reason. Damn it. #mantra 

I guess when you feel unappreciated, you have to appreciate other things so you will be able to appreciate yourself again. Maybe sometimes it doesn't matter if other people don't appreciate us. 

I need to be awake in a few hours because I'm going to attend a 9AM-5PM lecture. This is new to me so I'm excited and nervous at the same time. / I'm learning and I think it was a good decision but the thing is, you don't need to talk to people. Lol. 

Even though I'm broke, I decided to watch the game today as a reward for myself from yesterday and just because. Hehe. 

The system is once again as messy as my hair. 

I can't wait for 5pm. But there's too many event outside this little room! Though I'm so thankful for internet/free WiFi that's available. / tea time! / it wasn't interesting as the first day. 

I want to eat something greasy but I can't find something.  Too many people here in the mall and I'm alone. -_- 

The clip of my earphones fall off somewhere. So sad.

When hunger strikes and you are alone in a mall where there's too many people. Hopefully, I will be full enough with my resto choice just because there are chairs available. 

I just want to try it. It's scary but we'll see. I still know my walls and the boundaries so, everything is good.

Emoji can change the understanding of other people from your own message. 

Watching this all over again makes me realize again that's it's so good to fall in love. I miss feeling that.

WHY DO YOU HAVE TO DO THIS, THIS WEEK. SO ANNOYING. 

I FEEL SO HARASSED. 

This will be thoughest day to do this. For sure there will be a lot of tears this time. Screw everyone who fucking don't like me because I contradict all of your ideas/plans. 

I wonder. 

My delay, my consequences. Good thing I'm done.

Palawan 2015 . Last Day

Aug 23 - last day :(

Packing is necessary on last day of a trip and it is so sad.

Gem's mom remember that I do drive and she asked me to drive back the SUV at home from Jollibee where Amelia will have her send off party. I drive in Palawan! No big deal.

Unfortunately, we needed to leave before Jollibee joined the party because we still need to pick up something and we need to check in at the airport. We have 4 bags and my hand carry will just be my backpack full of important stuff and when we got our boarding pass, the guy at the desk remind us that our boarding time will be at 1840 and it was just before 5PM. We check in early because PAL emailed me that our flight will be 1 hour early than the original schedule so technically, we need to be there 1 hour early to check in. Then when he told us that our boarding time will still be at 6:40PM we tried to seat there and Gem and I are not talking ( de javu part - last year we didn't talk before our flight because we haven't eaten breakfast until we are almost pissed inside the plane and Gem said, "can we buy food I'm hungry" and we are almost in a bad mood that time. Lesson from that, don't make us hungry unless we will be pissed.) this time we had food from Jollibee but something is missing, something inside us was left behind and we didn't finished our food when Gem said "you know we can still go out". I somehow knew it because when his brother was leaving the other day they went home to bring some Chaolong because their flight was delayed too.

We only have my backpack as our hand carry so we went outside and we went back home. While walking towards the outside of the airport we passed by on a TV and they are watching a replay of a UAAP basketball game and it was FEU vs DLSU! When we arrived at their house we just watched it and eat some cake while killing some time.

You don't know what we sacrifice and you are not making it worthy.

Before 6:30PM we headed back to the airport. This time, no turning back and somehow that "something missing" is okay now.

The worst part was, our original flight details will be apply which means we are bound to leave 8PM. I ask Gem if she wants to go back home again but she said "no" and I'm okay with that.

While waiting, Cebu Pacific cancelled a flight back to Manila and we, the passengers of PAL are worried because we might be cancelled too but then a PAL plane landed in front of us and we know we will not be cancelled. This is my first time to fly with PAL and I loved it but the speakers of their plane is choppy or it was just the one who are talking who are slang and pure of air while talking. Baymax - bhalalala

The sky is so clear I don't know why Cebu Pac cancelled their flight but it was a smooth flight for us.

It's bitter sweet to see the lights in Manila and I don't want to go home this time. I want to stay in Palawan because we enjoyed it too much. I became a local to that place. I missed the time that my hometown was as peaceful as it is in Puerto.

So sad. As soon as we landed in Manila the stress is just waiting for me but we need to go back in reality. Gem called reality amazing, I called it shitty.

I'm on my way home and I want to cry I know that it will be another stressful reality that I will face.

Bye Palawan, you will always be my home away from home and thank you for the wonderful memories.

Thank you specially to Gem's family for always welcoming me with open arms.

Will be back soon.

My Photographs: Palawan

Palawan 2015 . Fourth Day

Aug 22 - 4th day 

It's 9AM and we're on our way to Crocodile Farm (fingers crossed, I want to see Surigao!). 

I saw Surigao but not Julio!!! 

I can't believe this is our last full day because our flight will be tomorrow night and hello reality. 

We ate lunch at the Crocodile Farm and we ate sisig again! Yummy, one of my favorite. :D

After Crocodile Farm, we went to Baker's and Mitra then we went home early. Gem and I had this "conversation" and we can't wait for 7pm where we set a date with Lhea for dinner and a bit of a drinking session but after that conversation I dare her and we're out of the house in a snap but not until I found them waiting for me downstairs. We headed outside with Froilan, our new friend. Haha. 

Plaza Cuartel

We headed to Baybay but it rained while waiting for Lhea then we walked to the church then to Plaza Cuartel then we stayed at Neva's for some pizza then Robinsons to look for a gift for Amelia then we went home to left our bags and headed out again for a night version at Baybay. We decided to drink just to have a chill night then we need some coffee or hot choco and everything is almost closed except for McDo so we just change location and eat some fries while drinking hot choco before 1AM.

What is chill night and we are making our last night memorable. I don't want to leave.

last day will be posted, tomorrow.

My Photographs: Palawan

Palawan 2015 . Third Day

Aug 21 - 3rd day

It's midnight and I'm just staring at the ocean. So many waves as much as the thoughts in my head. If other people will stare at this right now, they might have different emotion and thoughts. 

Times like this it's always "someone" that's missing. I hate that. 

Chill morning. Love sleeping hearing the waves like it was raining as well as waking up with the beach crashing outside. But no sunrise since the weather is bipolar (everytime I'm there. lol). 

We swim at the beach for a while and take some hilarious videos. Haha

Then we left San Vicente and I just slept the whole trip back to Puerto Princesa. 

We ate at Bona's for dinner. Been craving that for 11 months now and finally! :D 

Goodnight. Long day ahead tomorrow and hopefully, it will not rain.

day 4 will be posted tomorrow

My Photographs: Palawan

Palawan 2015 . First and Second Day

Aug 19 - 1st day. 

After an hour delay of our flight we arrived safe and sound in Puerto Princesa at 7:20PM.

Lhea was waiting for an hour at the airport too!

Then dinner at Gem's place then we headed to Itoy's for some alone time with Lhea since she cannot join us again on this trip to El Nido. After an hour we separate ways because we need to be up early tomorrow. 

Aug 20 - 2nd day

Same with our trip last year, we are on our way to El Nido at 5AM. 

I'm appreciating this road trip than the first time last year. 

Should I try to nap? I'm enjoying the fresh breeze of cold air and the view on this road trip.

El Nido

Wow! Small and big lagoon this time. I enjoyed El Nido and it was so beautiful. 

We are in San Vicente now and we are spending one night here before going back to Puerto Princesa. 

The sea right outside this beach house it's going to be a beautiful morning tomorrow. Love this life. So simple.

day 3 will be tomorrow. 

My Photographs: Palawan