Random . March 2021

 

Two for today because I just don’t want to stare at the window just to wait for me to fall asleep. 

One more reason is I just want to feel numb a that I don’t like to feel 2015 all over again

There are those days that I wish someone will just hold me 

The tears of being exhausted staying in 

Why does it feels like it’s a breakup 

I can finally say that I have decent friends

It’s different when you catch up on a TV series with 5 season. It was not as intense as when you watch it when it was released. It was just literally Netflix and Chill. Binge watch just to be occupied 

Killing all my daydream

I almost forgot what it feels like to be outside 

Seeing notes from the past year which I can’t even remember but one thing is for sure, I lived in that moment. For sure next years, I will also forget what I’m feeling today. 

Another day that I’m having anxiety. You don’t have to know but I just want to document it for a reminder. 03.06.2021

11 years ago I was trying to prove someone but I guess it didn’t happen until this day and it will never will. Self love though, makes me realize my worth as well. 

Was it a daydream or it’s already a fantasy?

I guess you just really have to take good care of yourself than dictating people to stay at home. Maybe they already went back to the usual normal. 

You don’t have any idea but I just want to let you know even late that it’s been a handful of times where we crammed last minute. 

Will it be just all a dream?

When you doubt if you are already over sharing some of your personal shit, always remember that there are people who are really over sharing everything without them knowing it. 

Action speaks louder than words. A picture can tell a thousand of words. Never ever rely on CCTV it can never tell what you are thinking as of the moment. 

It was so good to be out again but it will take a while for it to happen again. 

If rejecting people comes with protecting myself or just to keep me sane, I’ll do it. 

Busy Saturday for a free Sunday. Why not. 

Barely, I really don’t have time for all the gossip and shit of these people. 

I’ve been watching a series for almost a month and I promise that after watching the five season of Lucifer, I’ll read a book 

It’s been a year since lockdown and some things still hit different this time. 

Some people and things are still taken for granted. 

Being in lockdown still makes me realize all the events, hobbies and places that I’ve attended or been to. Realizing that we can’t still socialize for a little longer. 

Maybe the last few years were taken for granted. 

I don’t want to watch a movie at night then I decided on watching “Billie Eilish: “The World’s a Little Blurry” when I think it will calm me. Dude, I’m so hype after watching that I want to write about a lot of things and do some crazy things and at the same time I shed some tears. Why. So much realizations too! 

I took one tonight just because I just want to sleep and not over think things. 

One of those days that I miss the usual normal, some people, events, hanging out with friends and some places. 

I miss talking to you. I miss the conversations. #M

Currently avoiding being too emotional. 

I have so many issues. Lol

I’m not willing to take a risk just for your own sake. 

25 years. 

Birthday and Anniversary really hit differently every single time. 

It will be remembered but it is also for you to take extra precaution

Hangout with hometown friends

Chill weekend 

Movies are probably one thing why we all survive the past year but watching documentaries about the street hit very different. I’m thinking how was them during this difficult time. Also, that normalcy that was somehow taken for granted. 

One year into this new normal and everything still hit very differently from time to time. 

Just bought some plain dark shirts and now I’m looking for some light shirt on my closet because summer. 

This is one reason why I can’t read because reality is too much. 

Still unsure about this vaccine 

I started reading this week and it’s a very slow progress

Thank you for peeking on my window 

It actually feels like the end of the world. 

Reading this part of the book makes me miss a very long conversations with you

Finished a book! Even it wasn’t the right choice for a reading come back 

As if aging also stop when we needed to stay at home and be locked up

Books and movies are not helping. It makes me miss a lot of things. 

Feels like 10 years will be stolen just like that. 

Sad to report that even with this pandemic and everyone is having some major realization in life, there are still people who doesn’t change.