Friday, December 31, 2021

Painful Snake

 Story time but how to start? 


I will never let the year 2021 to pass without me getting a tattoo. 


After 2018, I finally committed to “at least one tattoo per year” but it seems that December will always be the tattoo month. Even December stressed me out lately and I’m slowly starting to hate it, I don’t have much time to unwind and mostly I’m out of ideas on what tattoo to get unless I like and need to get a specific tattoo then I will but not during summer season. 


A few days before Christmas I finally messaged my tattoo artist on details but this time I don’t have plans. I just want to get a tattoo and I need it before end of the year. I didn’t told him that though. Ever since I got the skull he already made it ready if ever we will plan to continue it and his few suggestion is a snake. I’m so looking forward to it since I’m currently obsess with snakes because of the reptile people on Youtube. Unfortunately even it is easy to have a snake, I’ll pass since I’m not sure how really to take good care of them and the weather in here is very different which at some point, they do adjust. 


I was born under year of snake, btw. Which at some point I want to relate on why I like snakes. 


I planned an alternative if ever I will not be able to do my thigh but I can’t plan a tattoo quickly because I don’t like to end up regretting it years later. I had few small pieces but I’m in doubt so, NO. One reason why I pushed the continuation of the skull. 


One more reason why I want to get a tattoo for now is to feel something. I’ve been struggling from here and there in regard of all aspects of life. 2021 was full of surprises and like 2020, it still control us even it started to loosen up. 


2021 throw me some things that I didn’t expect to happen and by almost the end of the year, I made one major life decision. 


I wanted to make sure that I can still feel pain. That I’m still alive despite of everything. 


Physical pain is nothing compared to emotional pain. Take note of that. 


~


We agreed on the snake idea and now, how to execute but JT sent me some ideas already but it’s hard to plan it on chat. 

 

Went there before 8pm and we start by 10pm. Ended by 3am.  


Brain storming for 2 hours doesn’t hurt.





I love it. Even I wasn’t able to take much pictures because it was the most painful tattoo to date! Haha I was holding tightly on that chair and I can’t look at it longer while being outlined or shaded. I was planning to read a book or write something while it was happening but no. Haha the pain gods wants me to really feel something since I asked for it. Omg. Now, I do have an answer to the question “what is the most painful tattoo”. Lol. 


Don’t be fooled, the skull was already 2 years old. 


Till next session! Which I don’t know when. Haha 


ps. Let’s consider this as my 2021 year end post because I wasn’t able to reflect on my birthday and I don’t have much time to compose another one to reflect this year. 

Friday, December 24, 2021

On Repeat . Bite Me


Hey you, you should've known better, better to fuck with someone like me
Hey you, forever and ever you're gonna wish I was your wifey

Don't act so innocent
This was no accident
You planned this in the end
And now it's over

Say what you want to say
You lied and I got played
You threw it all away
And now it's over

Just face it
We didn't make it
You bit off more than you can chew
Can you taste it?

Hey you, you should've known better, better to fuck with someone like me
Hey you, forever and ever you're gonna wish I was your wifey
Should've held on, should've treated me right
I gave you one chance, you don't get it twice
Hey you, and we'll be together never, so baby you can bite me

Don't hold your breath
'Cause you're still choking on your words
Those things you said
Might be the last ones that I heard

So come pick up your clothes from the front yard
Sprinklers on, burn the rest in the backyard
Should've had the guts just to say goodbye
Now you're gonna have regrets for the rest of your life

Just face it
We didn't make it
You bit off more than you can chew
Can you taste it?

Hey you, you should've known better, better to fuck with someone like me
Hey you, forever and ever you're gonna wish I was your wifey
Should've held on, should've treated me right
I gave you one chance, you don't get it twice
Hey you, and we'll be together never, so baby you can bite me

I bet you taste me on the tip of your tongue
Tip of your tongue, tip of your tongue
I fell fast when I know I shoulda run
Know I shoulda run, know I shoulda run

I bet you taste me on the tip of your tongue
Tip of your tongue, tip of your tongue
I fell fast when I know I shoulda run
Know I shoulda run, know I shoulda run

Hey you, you should've known better, better to fuck with someone like me (Like me)
Hey you, forever and ever you're gonna wish I was your wifey
Should've held on, should've treated me right (Yeah yeah yeah)
I gave you one chance, you don't get it twice (Yeah yeah yeah)
Hey you, and we'll be together never, so baby you can bite me

 

Saturday, December 04, 2021

Tuesday, November 30, 2021

Random . November 2021


Time with family. Happy Birthday, Chubby cheeks :) 


No concrete plans for this whole week because of sudden changes but I’m glad to finish some of it today.  


PMS. 


This darkness is giving me chills. Lol I got to turn on the lights tomorrow. 


The good old days of SM is somehow back. Few people at night and I was able to score some snack and that overdue Potato Corner! 


I’ve finished some mini-series that I’ve been watching on Netflix that I don’t know if I can still finish one more book this year. Hehe. I’ll try my best. 


And just like that another week was over. 


Happy Birthday, Daddy. I miss you everyday. 11.06.2021


Happy Birthday, Sissy. 11.07.2021 


Church after so long. I didn’t go to church for some amount of year before but it was different this time because of the pandemic and not just my choice. 


The difference of church and state as well as the current reality and modern life we are living. 


Such a very long Sunday but somehow worth it. 


Listening to my current favorite Billie Eilish album for me not to feel guilty and for me not to cry. 


Should I write now or just let it pass. 


I miss you but …. #21


Walls are back again. 


Concerts should be a safe space. 


I just don’t want to risk going to the mall for nothing. 


Please don’t risk your kids. They need to get out as well but please don’t bring them on crowded places. 


Why can’t I say “no” and be firm about it? Still trying to figure out some ways for things to work even there will be a consequences and I’m very much aware of those. 


6 month mark of working out everyday was a little bit cut today because of M. 11.09.2021


Quick de clutter night. 


People who feels so entitled. Ughh. 


2 days being distracted while doing my workout. Making me upset right now. 


The universe doesn’t want me to buy anything from 11.11 


Finally. An uninterrupted work out. 


And then it hits me again. 11.11.2021 


“Sacrifices for nothing” / “Giving away too much and not getting any in return” 


Sad truth. 


THE LAST TIME. 11.11.2021 


I FUCKING NEED ANOTHER TATTOO. MIGHT AS WELL FINISH MY THIGH. 


That vivid dream. Huhu. 11.12.2021


Happy Birthday, Mama. Miss you. 11.13.2021


Tried a cup of coffee today. Not sure if the palpitations after is still there. 


WTF IS HAPPENING. POLITICS BEING A CIRCUS. 


I’m off for now on socials. I have so much thing to do. 


Lol. Wtf. My screen time is so high. 


The last time I reached my twitter limit was when PNoy died and the latest is today. 


POLITICS IS NOT A FUCKING JOKE. GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER. YOU CAN’T EVEN DECIDE RIGHT IF YOU WILL RUN OR NOT OR WHO WILL SAVE YOUR ASSES AND STILL YOU WANT TO BE A PRESIDENT. THIS IS NOT YOUR GRADE SCHOOL OR HIGH SCHOOL CLASSROOM. 


THE MOA GLOBE!!!! HAHAHA / ok it was just for promo but it was fun. 


Cleaning on a Sunday because it is the only day that I can. 


All I want to do now is to fix my hard drives. Huhu 


A bottle of a new purchased 250ml Bactidol fell. Huhu


Taylor Swift on repeat for the next few weeks. Hehe 


Hehe. Don’t lecture me religiously when you have bad choice for the government and this country. 


Yay. Maximize time as I squeeze some work for tonight. 


Gifts for the cousins arrived today! Can’t wait to give it to them on Christmas. Haha


Some things are really beyond our control. 


Huhu. I’m craving some Tim Hortons donuts. 


When plane tickets are pretty cheap but I still don’t like to take the risk. 


I’m a little bit down but now I’m back on track. 


It’s been a year since I got the go signal for lasik! 11.19.2021


I was finally able to travel with my dude but it was just a dream. Huhu


When people don’t like to adjust, you have to accept to do it all. Some people don’t really have much consideration in life. 


Finally decided to use my iPhone as the personal phone and the Android the work phone. 


Why is it frustrating that my online orders didn’t arrive today? Haha


Yay. I’m switching phones today!!! / Switched!!!  11.21.2021 


Some gem you find on Twitter out of nowhere. Hehe. Hi tita!! :) 


Done with almost everything I need to do and it’s just Monday. 


It always feel like we have to start all over again. 


Anxiety here we go again. 


Why does the line today is longer than usual. Huhu I want you be done before lunch. / long line but I got a lower number than before. 


Productive Wednesday. Was able to finish everything. 


Early date. 11.25.2021 


Was able to see some friends today due to an unfortunate event. 


My mom have been eaten by K-drama now. 


Major life decision. 11.25.2021


What is the future of that ass long letter. 11.27.2021


Hello, mela. 


I’m interested to this movie but I’m so sleepy in the first hour. Lol 


Busy Sunday. Lets do this. 


Wasted 2 hours already the past days. I guess it was okay I’m still on the right track of time. Haha I’m not always like this but if schedule is full I have to do it on time. 


I need all the music of the strong women on my playlist. 


I’m not going to unfriend you just because of your political view but please think about your children before voting such candidate. We are somehow and still surviving this pandemic don’t let another chaos happen to this country for the next years. Please do know your candidate capabilities and on what will be the future if they win. 

Pandemic + selfish candidate = doomsday. 


Done with busy day for this month. 


Why does this sound so bad for the rest of the year? Huhu. I might cry. 


2 years in a row. Huhu. 


On the other news we have budget for coffee for the planner. 


Stressed out. 


Starbucks run. 


IKEA craze was real. Omg. Good thing I was able to do that in Indonesia in 2018. Hehe but I still want to visit the branch here but maybe after everyone else. Hehe