Exhausted.

I use to escape this town once a week or every other week to see a more crowded place but at the end of the day, I still see myself going back here. Most people are busy with their own life and here I am stuck with my own.

I'm not complaining that I'm stuck in here it's just that some people think we personally don't need to be out there. I love it here, promise but sometimes staying is exhausting. Too many times I'm telling that this wasn't the town I used to know years ago. People left and change as well as the environment. There are times that I ask myself if I'm already left behind since I decided to stay or maybe advanced since I have experiences from a few different places. Or maybe I made wrong life decision other than staying since people my age are constantly upgrading their lives.

The last few weeks has been tough to face because I'm questioning myself with the decisions I'm making since other people are still fucking comparing and because they judge me for who I am. I know we can't please everybody but I can't help but be hurt and isolate myself from the outside world. Shit happens and it's fucking real. Challenging as always but we gotta face it even a tub of ice cream, a slice of a cake and couple of chocolates can't do the magic they used to have to make us a little bit better.

Adulthood is really hard. Some gave up while some people are fighting to have tomorrow and for us who still have it should not take it for granted. We need to survive. I need to survive.

Some people will not understand this kind of situation because for them we should just live each day the way we should but they will never try to understand why we need to just stay in bed all day just to reorganize our thoughts and ourselves.

Time and day will always leave us since at some point these two doesn't know what rest means.

I don't even know what's missing that I can't also figure out  what is happening. One thing for sure, I need to get out of this town and I'm craving for some travel because I'm exhausted.

"Kids are super easy. Its being an adult that's hard." - Girls S06E05